Be they friends, enemies, bullies, wackosthey wont have anything against a thoroughly sharpened tongue. In fact, here are 21 anti-jokes you cant help but laugh at anyway. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. 1y. You can expand the previous tip even further by giving it an extra positive interpretation. You have a right to your opinion, and I have a right to tell you what I think about it. Should I offer you a tic-tac or a toilet paper? I hope your day becomes filled with people like you. A simple Yes, magic is sufficient. I wasnt born with enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel. Continue with Recommended Cookies. I am completely happy: I have everything I need. Do you have an opinion? Whats the difference between these two idiots? Oops, my bad. When it comes naturally to them, it may be useful to point it out. I don't think you're an idiot but what's my opinion compared to countless others? Witty Comebacks. Comeback of the Abandoned Wife - Chapter 77 - Wuxiaworld Self-confidence means that you can do whatever you want without worrying others saying anything about it. How long did it take you to come up with that one? Be ready. I have always had a thing against the Mister Know-It-Alls. I accidentally cut someone off the other day and instead of flipping me off the guy gave me a big thumbs down out the window, and that hit harder, shares Reddit user C0L0RBLINDz. "I don't know where I parked" before continuing "where. I am cool! What is difference between "don't remember" and "not that remember" The great thing about meta comments is that you no longer have to go into what the other person is saying. Humorous, intelligent, warm comebacks are hugely important for the following reasons: DISCLAIMER: Really apply comebacks with warmth , love and a wink . Are you afraid that zombies will eat your brain? So: interpret ms (as if it were a compliment): : Why? Say whats on your mind without fear of rejection, because what does this secretly communicate very powerfully? That time spent alone can be relaxing, energising and spiritual. It interferes with a persons main task in life becoming a better person. May the chocolate chips in your cookies always turn out to be raisins. Dont make the outcome of an interaction or provocation important to yourself. Your lips are moving. You dont need anything yourself, such as validation from others. 2023 | Happy Rubin | Full disclosure: as Amazon Associates we earn from qualifying purchases | Privacy Policy | Affiliate Policy, More freedom in your life: 11 tips to create & experience freedom, Stop comparing yourself to others constantly [Tips], Powerful Motivation Music [Top 10 Songs That Motivate You], Best Books About Self Confidence [Top 10] [2023 Update], Reframing: 362 Techniques + Examples [Quotes & Tips], Taking responsibility, how do you do that? putting up a long and boring story about a crappy job. Dealing With Setbacks & Hardship [Lessons & Examples], Presuppositions language pattern: meaning & examples [NLP], Peripheral Vision: Meaning & Exercise [Essential Skill], How to make dreams come true? 15 Comebacks for Dealing with Mean People | Power of Positivity So dont react too indignantly if the other person spontaneously undresses, kisses you or says or does something sexual. 75. I couldve sworn I was dealing with an adult. Stick to your vision. You have repulsive idiots that nobody wants to deal with and you have delicious idiots that everyone loves. Since narcissistic is such a big word for you, how about asshole? You can find more about pleasure in this article. Theres only one thing that keeps me from breaking you in halfI dont want two of you around! Im not insulting you. If I dont talk to you like that long., Didnt you know you shouldnt play hard to get, with men who are hard to get?, Thats unimportant, are you comfortable with the way you look?, Tip 19. Youre like the end pieces of a loaf of bread. Do you know whats so special? I would frown if that small bit of energy was worth wasting on you. Do you think its because he thinks you are stupid, ugly, Stupid, or could it be because hes trying to pick up on you? Stop thinking about yourself and become one with your environment and the people around you. If youre going to act like a turd, go lay on the yard. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. And that soft, indistinct voice with poor eye contact? I would love to insult you, but that would be beyond the level of your intelligence. Part! After all, arming yourself with great comebacks is better than being unarmed. Do you have a minute? 10 Likes, 1 Comments - PGame Bakez (@pgamebakez) on Instagram: "DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK! What was that? With all my wrinkles., If someone criticizes: Yes, thats right, especially on Wednesdays., Yes, we do have the worst customer service. , dont try to prove yourself or fish for compliments. I think youve confused me with pretty much all the other men youve ever met., Of course, no problem. Sometimes, its better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that youre stupid rather than open it and remove all doubt. I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you. Were you beaten as a child? Too bad you cant photoshop an ugly personality. You have to believe me. I want to honor my teachers though: what you are reading is developed by people who worked hard on it. Stupidity is not a crime, so youre free to go. Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too. Where do pain and fear of rejection come from? That sounds like a you problem. This is one of those good comebacks for when your kids are making their lack of planning your emergency. Oops, my bad. Then it must be none of your business. Communicating emotions is much more important. End of story. order to gain validation from a source outside of yourself. Can you buy me a drink / do this for me / hold this?. I and you both dont have to be here, you can go, is better than trying to prove yourself in response to the other. It was in my business. You might know this quote from Fight Club: Only after youve lost everything, youre able to do anything. Thats the kind of humor that makes you pretend youre an over the horse diva. 03 "Make me.". or withdraw your attention and interest and actually do so if the other person is, I can also stop / leave if you dont want me to make you happy.. The lawyer tries to save face with I think we got off on the wrong foot here, and Brockovich quickly counters with Thats all you got lady, two wrong feet and ugly shoes. Save it for the next time someone is rude to you and tries to cry wrong foot. This is definitely one of those movies with the best one-liners youll want to say over and over. The world does NOT revolve around you and I do not require your permission to speak. This principle allowed Donald Trump to become president while by definition also had to get many haters to achieve that. 21 Funny Comebacks to Use When Asked Awkward Personal Questions ], ll try being nicer if youll try being smarter.. Then be extra tough, look arrogantly at your nails and say: That was my move., We were both wrong. What if we ran away together, and you sent a message to your friend saying, I ran away with the man in the red shoes., Tip 20. But it doesnt feel all that satisfying, especially when the other person got to have his or her say while you didnt. How should it be done? Two minus points for you. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Dear reader, thank you so much for dropping by on this curious happiness blog. Jealously is a disease. This ability to anonymously put your thoughts out there for others to see leads people to frequently type and publish things they would NEVER say to someones face. Did you fall from heaven? . Id insult you, but then Id have to explain it afterwards, so never mind. In your case, they're nothing. That isnt even worth a comeback, Ill just let you dwell on that failure. about failing her way to blogging success, 9 Strategies for Disruptive Behavior In the Classroom, Small Gifts for Kindergarten Students (31+ Ideas), End of the Year Gifts for Kindergarten Students (Ideas-Easy and Inexpensive), 21+ Christmas Gifts for Kindergarten Students (Easy and Inexpensive), Disruptive Kindergarten Behaviors (Troubleshooting and Tips To Deal With Them), Gumption Traps (A Guide For Teachers and Parents). Is that your awkward way of trying to make friends with me? I dont know where you bought your opinion, but I hope you kept the receipt. Stick with that feeling. It defines who you are. Such actions of yours should really earn others. I'm not insulting you. If I wanted to talk to you, I would have called you first. What you lack in intelligence, you more than make up for in stupidity. You are much, MUCH worse! For example, when you walk into a party, you can do so with two mindsets: You are in your head because you let everything revolve around you. If your date makes a sexual comment that you like, dont get over your apropos but stay unchanged in your vibe. You are not a plaything of the other person who has you completely under his / her control? By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Let us know what you would do in the comments section below. But in your case, go ahead., I dont have the energy to pretend I like you today., Actually I want to tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I dont want to see your ugly face every day., I never forget a face, but in your case I will gladly make an exception., If karma doesnt get to you, Id love to., Woman to Churchill: If I were married to you, I would put poison in your food.. Thank you I am ten and a grup of girls are messing with me and they will back of wen I say these thangs to them lol, I am ten wen I tell those Im simply explaining why Im right. All you have to do is click the comment button or click reply and BOOM you get to have your say, whether or not anyone wanted to hear what you had to say or contribute. Never prove yourself and even see how you. Im guessing that there were times when you were in the middle of a nonsensical argument, and you couldnt help but remain silent and get overwhelmed by the situation. Oh, just a few. Then you have the liberating, fuck it feeling! happens to me all the time too, mostly a joke between friends but can get very annoying. Meta-naming you ignore it for inappropriate: Okay I pretend I didnt hear that different topic. Lets pretend we never had this conversation., The other says defiantly, Are you picking up on me?. OQUI LIFE SERIES SPOILERS !! on Twitter: "// limited life False Modesty can be worse than arrogance. ', Who could forget about the scene in Legally Blondewhen Elle Woods loser ex-boyfriend condescendingly asks, You got into Harvard Law? to which Elle responds, What, like its hard?. From Reddit user VigorousRapscallion: I was playing a drinking game that involves rules being made on the fly. Long story short, because you wouldnt be able to follow with the long one. Take a page from Don Drapers book. Thats just fine. I dont know what your problem is, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce. The correct attitude is: I dont need anything from nobody. 77 . it helps. chvgs 3 min. Whenever I see you, middle finger gets an erection. Self-confidence means that you can do whatever you want without worrying others saying anything about it. ago. Read further. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To say "silence is golden" is to say that their . Thats the kind of humor that makes you pretend youre an over the horse diva. 1. Take off that social mask. Thats a bonus you only get with us., If someone asks for extra explanation while your action was clear enough then also: dont explain yourself: That is asking for the known way., Im too shy. Then I go to others who want me the way I am. Here are some powerful comebacks to arm yourself with: Related Check out these comebacks for jerks! It was in my business. Ive always been good at comebacks, but these are perfect to use. Arrogance. Oh, you dont like being treated the way you treat me? . , Or by saying, Im just an ordinary guy, nothing special.. How To Deal With Sensory Overload [9 Tips For Overstimulation], How To Stop Being So Hard On Yourself [9 Great Tips], How To Stop Wasting Time In Life: Take This Crucial Advice, How to start a conversation with anyone: 15 tips [Making contact], 372 Friend Tag Q&A Questions [Best Friend Quiz], Best conversation topics: always have topics to talk about, Clingy & controlling behavior of partner/date [Extreme examples], Friendzoned? Erin Kayata joined Readers Digest as an assistant staff writer in March 2019, coming from the Stamford Advocate where she covered education. 32 Savage Comebacks for "Who Asked", "Did I Ask", "Nobody Asked," etc I may be fat, but fat can be burned. Oh, didnt I tell you? This one is total warfareonly use if peace is not an option. I hear bullies are insecure about themselves, is that true? You already have everything in yourself. There is no worse time to shower for example your partner with compliments than when he / she gives you the cold shower. Thinking of yourself your ego sucks energy. People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character. Got a comeback list for a person whos a NARCIST ? you dont have it, thats sad(use sarcasm! Im an acquired taste. I dont make decisions based upon opinions from people who dont have to deal with the outcome. It must be hard putting makeup on your two faces. 02 "I will not be silenced!". Who were blessed by the Lord. If so, Id love to hear them. You know what an asshole is, right? You have your entire life to be nosy. Good Comebacks for Unwanted Opinions (Our Favorites) Easy. Never trust the advice of a man in difficulties. 100 Good Comebacks Savage Comebacks in an Argument - Ponly You have the right to remain silent because whatever you say will probably be stupid anyway. May both sides of your pillow be uncomfortably warm. I was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I guess it's true what everyone says about you. Take a deep breath and hold it for approximately twenty minutes. This exchange happened accidentally between me and my boyfriend the other day and its been legendary for us ever since: After making an honest mistake he said, Sorry Im an idiot. And I, wanting to reassure him but failing miserably, replied, Dont be sorry for who you are! Where all our . You are not as bad as people say. You are seriously amazing! If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke. Anything better than pleasing . Manage Settings Hey! You have a perception problem! Heres a tissue, you have a little piece of sh*t on your lips. Located in the Pacific Northwest of the US, Emily is a mom and part-time blogger, jumping in front of the computer when the kids are sleeping. Hello! You can try and educate this loud extrovert or deliver one of our good comebacks: You're not there. Now I know why everyone talks about you behind your back. Churchill: And if I married you, I would eat it. Never give others your appreciation from a position of weakness. To get back to comebacks , dont try to prove yourself or fish for compliments. A funny comeback will help you win an argument. Another comeback that doesnt miss: Oooh, you wanna kiss me so bad. If someone is angryor obsessedenough with you, the insinuation that they in fact harbor affection towards you is all it takes to tilt a power struggle back in your favor. Then pull out your hand with that middle finger up), If your acting so two faced can you at least make one of them look decent? It's now available in my Etsy" Dont care what the other thinks about you. omg im not getting bullied anymore by armful , Your email address will not be published. Share your energy. Everyone wins. Dont ask for energy, such as approval, where its about you. I would ask you how old you are, but I know that you can't count that high. If youre gonna be a smartass, first you have to be smart. Theres no need to repeat yourself. Remember, going the extra mile is one of the best ways for genius comebacks. Definitely will use them against those dumb meanies at my school- thanks! Are you doing this with every woman you take out? "you probably waited your entire useless fucking existence just to feel like you said something even remotely funny, well . I dont do something unless everyone wins. No, you dont have to do anything, except brush your teeth., Tip 10. It would be OK to say them together, you might ask someone. 200+ Best Comebacks, Funny Insults, and Savage Roasts 100 Funny and Witty Replies to Rude Comments - PairedLife How To Stop Being Bullied For Good [Crucial Tips & Advice], Funny Congratulations For Old People [Aging Humour], Raising Kids With Confidence And Self worth [15 Tips]. can u add these 1.underneath all that male bravado there us just a insecure little girl just banging on the door trying to get out. Answer (1 of 8): Which is correct, 'I don't remember where I parked' or 'where did I park'? A great way to reframe is to play dummy: Someone who is worthy does not have to defend himself / herself because this person knows he / she is worthy. Well, the jerk store called and theyre running out of you. George Constanza of Seinfeld dropped this epic line. It's incredibly charismatic. World model rethinking is a simple and powerful technique. If you have lost everything of the ego, there is nothing left to protect. The only thing offending me right now though is your face. Never defend yourself, but accept and exaggerate (self-mockery). If I had a dollar for every brain you dont have, Id have a dollar. In this article, you have found tons of great comeback methods that boost the heat and vibe. Talk about a double whammy! This is a partnership. Good job. Is a good one I like to use that keeps them quiet! And if this one doesnt do it for you, weve got plenty of pirate jokes on deck. If you dont listen, I will come that way and you should pay attention! Im sorry for hurting your feelings, I thought you already knew you were stupid. Solid. I couldve sworn I was dealing with an adult. This one is a little stealthy. The correct attitude is: I dont need anything from nobody. Earth is full. You almost reached a level of coherency resembling my newborn son. You also have to cook dinner. Your state of mind remains unchanged. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. So you can great help, improvise, flowen and have nice conversations. You are about to exceed the limits of my medication. Tip 3. Remember, thumbs are human beings greatest tools for a reasonuse them. Your brain has two partsthe 'left' and the 'right'. Conversely, "not that I remember" means something is false as far as you know, but could still be true unbeknownst to you. Me:AH yes its the aroma of originality! Brains aren't everything. May you always step on a wet spot after putting on fresh socks. You smell like drama and headache. and our